Cannot say it is easy, but if you have borne a kid, you can handle him no matter what his age. Undoubtedly, teen years are a few of the hardest for parents, but so are they for the children. Your teenagers can be aggressive, rebellious, loud, crybabies, quiet, or shy, but know that these are typical traits of a living human being.
They are at an age where everything makes sense, yet nothing does. So, the worry is theirs more than it is yours. You rather have the responsibility as adults that you ease up on them in years they are growing both emotionally and physically. Celebrate their growth with them. I know, as parents, you want to direct their lives because you want the best for them. However, go back to when you were a teenager. Did you like to be controlled? Not really?
So, do not do what you did not want for yourself. Otherwise, this will only create a gap between you and your kids. Let them be their persons, and you will see that they can handle themselves pretty well.
Of course, nothing of this is easy. Thus, we have collected five proven techniques to make it easier for you to deal with your amazing teenagers:
The first tip is that you keep communication flowing. Build a teenager’s trust in you. You can do that by putting yourself in their shoes. Think and see from their lens. Appreciate them on every good thing they happen to say or do. Do not scold them on things they do wrong. Instead, try to make them talk about why they did it.
Also, the teenage years can get lonely. With Covid-19, even adults are feeling anxious and alone, so these are hard times for teenagers. Cozy family time can help combating isolation in these times.
2.Set the Right Expectations
Remember, your significant effort should be minimizing the gap between yourself and your teenage kids. You have to avoid any mistake that might lead to your kids going away from you. One such misunderstanding is expecting too much or expecting irrational things. Your kid would love you, no matter what.
That is why they try to fulfill your expectations. However, if you are hoping to involve them in house chores so they cannot see their friends after school without an occasion, that would not be fair. If your expectations are reasonable, your kids will surely try their best to live up to them. So, do not complicate the simple.
3.Look out for the Red Flags
A lot of the physical and emotional changes are typical among teenagers. It would be best if you looked forward to them. However, look out for the extreme differences. Do not just shrug away what does not seem right. If your kid is gaining or losing weight to a significant amount or is messing with the law, consider it a warning sign.
Suppose they are talking about suicide with anyone or show signs of fear of a particular place or person and have recently changed or stopped seeing friends, again such warning signals mean you need to communicate better. If that does not help, seek professional help. You need to try and address the causes of the changes appropriately. Otherwise, these traits can mar your kid’s personality forever.
4.Observe them while Respecting their Privacy
Most parents struggle with respecting their kids’ privacy because they believe it to be their responsibility to keep a check on them. So, the technique here is to keep a check on them while respecting their privacy. Do not invade their bedrooms whenever you feel like, do not ask for their phone’s password, do not tag along wherever they go, do not decide their friends for them, etcetera. However, observe them and do not point anything out unless it is essential. Again, it is vital to invade their privacy only if they show any warning signs.
5.Place your Anger Rightly
You might not agree with a lot that your kids do. For example, their dressing sense, bad jokes, a couple of their friends, and the person they are dating. One day your kid might show up with blue hair or a tattoo on their arm. These things are outrageous for you but healthy for them.
If you get angry with them about these things, you will only be creating a vast gap between yourself and your teenage kids. Only get mad on them if they have done something immoral or harmful. Otherwise, you can manage all things with proper communication.
If you follow the techniques mentioned above, your relationship with your teenagers will eventually improve. Remember, your kids are human beings too. So, it would be best if you worked on them with patience. While you better your communication with them, remember to educate them about their bodies, gender, and mental health issues. Awareness at a young age is crucial because it defines their personality in later life. Happy Parenting!